Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
