How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
