No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i was born a porn star she said
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
where are you?
Hypothermia
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
