Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
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