I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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