No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize