Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.

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(732): pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom. http://tfl.nu/lqbf

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(812): View more from Indiana

Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.

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(812): Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward. http://tfl.nu/8jbn

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(734): View more from Michigan

we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".

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(734): we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS". http://tfl.nu/4yux

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(619): View more from California

you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top

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(619): you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top http://tfl.nu/edw1

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(252): View more from North Carolina

so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us

(205): View more from Alabama

that didnt stop you

(252): View more from North Carolina

nope

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(252): so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us (205): that didnt stop you (252): nope http://tfl.nu/4max

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(917): View more from New York City

Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.

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(917): Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub. http://tfl.nu/g66e

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(770): View more from Georgia

It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.

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(770): It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college. http://tfl.nu/l73u

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(503): View more from Oregon

What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?

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(503): What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you? http://tfl.nu/o1lb

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(863): View more from Florida

fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"

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(863): fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes" http://tfl.nu/05z7

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....

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(919): Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends.... http://tfl.nu/5sph

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(310): View more from California

I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.

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(310): I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/laj1

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"

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(781): he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me" http://tfl.nu/6fll

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(407): View more from Florida

There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.

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(407): There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese. http://tfl.nu/1bs2

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(713): View more from Texas

The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.

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(713): The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross. http://tfl.nu/mx32

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?

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(508): OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities? http://tfl.nu/uepx

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