Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward. http://tfl.nu/djmy
  Replies (64) Good night (1912) Bad night (8483)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis. http://tfl.nu/lwww
  Replies (57) Good night (6137) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  what?

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn (952): what? (612): i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn http://tfl.nu/vdma
  Replies (29) Good night (7832) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (580): White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy. http://tfl.nu/gb3d
  Replies (33) Good night (4617) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed http://tfl.nu/d8dr
  Replies (15) Good night (3433) Bad night (1167)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly. http://tfl.nu/rajr
  Replies (11) Good night (4147) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date. http://tfl.nu/r3cq
  Replies (17) Good night (806) Bad night (6578)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper. http://tfl.nu/471e
  Replies (10) Good night (4130) Bad night (869)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was. http://tfl.nu/9bfo
  Replies (6) Good night (2567) Bad night (1477)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome. http://tfl.nu/65yv
  Replies (15) Good night (4972) Bad night (1168)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog http://tfl.nu/1yan
  Replies (12) Good night (973) Bad night (2778)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  My bed is full of blood and feathers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): My bed is full of blood and feathers http://tfl.nu/0j2w
  Replies (10) Good night (594) Bad night (1422)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen? (484): i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed http://tfl.nu/7o4k
  Replies (7) Good night (1131) Bad night (463)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!

  (386): View more from Florida

  Gravity is no match for my libido

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work! (386): Gravity is no match for my libido http://tfl.nu/l272
  Replies (2) Good night (959) Bad night (373)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  "Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): "Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right? http://tfl.nu/p6ak
  Replies (1) Good night (577) Bad night (239)

Randomize