Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+27): View more from South Africa

I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.

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(+27): I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork. http://tfl.nu/lbeq

Replies (20) Good night (2830) Bad night (696)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I cont stop tolking in a british axsent

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(215): I cont stop tolking in a british axsent http://tfl.nu/j2m9

Replies (45) Good night (4118) Bad night (1059)
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(607): View more from New York

I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.

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(607): I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships. http://tfl.nu/rdml

Replies (22) Good night (936) Bad night (3284)
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(718): View more from New York

I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.

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(718): I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide. http://tfl.nu/8m3e

Replies (6) Good night (4469) Bad night (749)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!

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(303): Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties! http://tfl.nu/mly2

Replies (12) Good night (892) Bad night (4706)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.

(760): View more from California

Wow.

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(901): Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered. (760): Wow. http://tfl.nu/1wu1

Replies (16) Good night (4283) Bad night (1531)
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(917): View more from New York City

well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."

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(917): well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you." http://tfl.nu/h98x

Replies (3) Good night (3155) Bad night (858)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final

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(724): Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final http://tfl.nu/g3gv

Replies (7) Good night (2568) Bad night (1019)
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(254): View more from Texas

There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.

(512): View more from Texas

That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.

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(254): There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option. (512): That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too. http://tfl.nu/lz3p

Replies (9) Good night (2962) Bad night (1245)
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(816): View more from Missouri

Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7

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(816): Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7 http://tfl.nu/lqxi

Replies (4) Good night (1089) Bad night (376)
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(904): View more from Florida

And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface

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(904): And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface http://tfl.nu/ohqh

Replies (2) Good night (600) Bad night (321)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night

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(412): i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night http://tfl.nu/3wkg

Replies (4) Good night (897) Bad night (298)
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(512): View more from Texas

are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT

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(512): are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka? (832): .....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT http://tfl.nu/f2zn

Replies (1) Good night (730) Bad night (308)
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(949): View more from California

Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley

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(949): Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley http://tfl.nu/vphj

Replies (0) Good night (572) Bad night (249)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.

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(403): Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me. http://tfl.nu/p2to

Replies (1) Good night (334) Bad night (483)

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