i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
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Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
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That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration