She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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