So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
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I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
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No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
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