Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.

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  (330): hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival. http://tfl.nu/kgpd
  Replies (9) Good night (4432) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.

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  (919): sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer. http://tfl.nu/u6do
  Replies (13) Good night (6051) Bad night (1258)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.

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  (603): I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad. http://tfl.nu/5dfv
  Replies (12) Good night (1221) Bad night (3928)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.

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  (843): great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/cndy
  Replies (5) Good night (1707) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...

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  (405): please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin... http://tfl.nu/m01o
  Replies (2) Good night (551) Bad night (1914)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.

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  (570): No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am. http://tfl.nu/layb
  Replies (6) Good night (1849) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him

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  (519): he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him http://tfl.nu/dkoo
  Replies (3) Good night (1181) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass

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  (302): His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass http://tfl.nu/wy91
  Replies (5) Good night (1395) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I think that's mostly how we became friends.

  (1-817): View more from Texas

  Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.

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  (817): I think that's mostly how we became friends. (1-817): Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me. http://tfl.nu/n6nc
  Replies (9) Good night (1742) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!

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  (612): Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend? (701): In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing! http://tfl.nu/fqw2
  Replies (11) Good night (1966) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.

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  (770): I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed. http://tfl.nu/l5l2
  Replies (1) Good night (942) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.

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  (785): Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes. http://tfl.nu/4ozu
  Replies (6) Good night (992) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yes. It does.

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  (309): It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with (847): Yes. It does. http://tfl.nu/cna3
  Replies (4) Good night (787) Bad night (245)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.

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  (818): Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy. http://tfl.nu/efkg
  Replies (4) Good night (792) Bad night (213)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me

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  (304): My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me http://tfl.nu/flmi
  Replies (4) Good night (514) Bad night (134)

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