I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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