no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I can't trust your balls anymore.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
