Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
