we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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