So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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