Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
