saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
