Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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