i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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