your thong is hanging out like whoa
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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