I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
