Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
True strength comes from lack of pants
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
