would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
