What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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