We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
