Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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