areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
