this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
