soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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