thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
