I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
My pussy is not your playground.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize