I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
a search helicopter?!
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
