i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
