For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
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