He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
