Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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