I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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