I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
