Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
