like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
