I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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