My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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