I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
