I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize