I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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