what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
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