she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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