I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
