you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
