is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
