Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
